Currently, Iris is sitting on the mat by my front door looking at me with her “I’d like to go for a walk” eyes.  Now, as a dog owner you would think this is something I’d be used to.  However, we have a problem.  I am anti-walk.  The problem I have with walking is not the physical aspect of the walk, walking I can handle.  The part of walking I take issue with is the time aspect.

First of all, she decides when it is time to go for a walk, and I resent that.  I am the boss, I will decide when we go for walks, not you with your pathetic eyeballs and door sitting.  Second, I don’t enjoy that open-endedness of the walk.  I like rules, regulations and boundaries.  I would like to know specifically when the walk will begin, and when it will end.  Walking seems pointless and time wasting to me.  Unless you are walking to go and get something to eat, or walking to the LCBO to get some delicious cocktails, I really just feel like the walk is an exercise in futility.

So, after this little rant I still have to talk the bean for a walk.  I wouldn’t mind if someone was around to go with me on my walk, that serves as a distraction and I can deal with that.  So, if you would like to come over and walk her with me, that would be great.  Even better, you come over and take her for a walk while I sit on the couch and watch Intervention, because it’s Monday night and that’s what I do on Mondays.  You can come in and watch too, after the walk.  If you’re not too creepy.

Poop scoop bags included.

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